Wednesday, September 7, 2011

When Everything got lost in Translation!!!

Original Song--

Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast Mast Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast

Nahin Tujhko Koi Hosh Hosh Uspar Joban Ka Josh Josh

Nahin Tera Koi Dosh Dosh Madhosh Hai Tu Har Vakt Vakt

Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast Mast...

Aashiq Hai Tera Naam Naam Dil Lena Tera Kaam Kaam

Meri Baahen Mat Thaam Thaam Badnaam Hai Tu Madamast Mast

Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast Mast...

Bol Zara Tu Jaane Mehboobi Mujh Mein Aisi Kya Hai Khoobi

Tu Ek Resham Ki Dor Dor Teri Chaal Pe Aashiq Mor Mor

Teri Zulf Ghani Chitchor Chor Ghanghor Ghata Madamast Mast

Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast Mast...

Ye Dil Teri Aankhon Mein Dooba Ban Ja Meri Tu Mehbooba

Mat Teer Nazar Ke Maar Maar Ye Chot Lagegi Aar Paar

Aasaan Samajh Mat Yaar Yaar Ye Pyaar Bada Hai Sakht Sakht

Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast Mast...

English translation--

You are a very cool cool kind of thing

You are a very cool thing

You do not have any sense sense

On top of it youth's enthusiasm enthusiasm

You are not at fault fault

You are happily drunk every time time

(YOU)

Lover is your name name

Taking heart job job

Don't grab grab my arms my arms

You are cool infamous (and) intoxicated

You speak little my lover,what special traits do i have

(ME again)

You are a silk thread thread thread

You are a silk thread thread thread

Your walk makes your lovers go peacock peacock

Your dense hair,your dense hair, heart stealer

(Like)Cool deep clouds intoxicated

This heart has drowned in your eyes,become my lover

(YOU)

Don't throw throw arrows (of) eyes

This will wound through and through

Don't think love love to be easy

This love is hard hard

(THE INCORRIGIBLE ME)

You are a very cool cool kind of thing

You are a very cool thing

Credit: Sudipta Samanta

(lost in translation)

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Nostalgic ruminations of a very temporarily jobless guy....

One of those sentimental moments when suddenly you get drunk in nostalgia and start missing every goddamn thing that ever happened to you in your four years at college.

The first ragging session near the mechanical building where a certain fat ass gamer decided to play cool and resulted in you being let off easily. I am ever grateful to you Souvik Bhattacharya and I know how internet speeds are measured.

A die hard Arsenal fan who suddenly decided that he would play up front in the finals of the fresher’s tournament and calmly missed 5 sitters and smiled and said “Goal Keeper ta boddo boro cheharar” Soumya Bandopadhyay your striking abilities are just like that of the team you support: NON-EXISTENT.

A beer hog TT player whose only aim post a facebook profile was to attract attention via weirder posts, whose day unfailingly started at 1 in the afternoon and sometimes extended till 3 AM in the Departmental Library. At least that’s what your parents thought Arnab Basu. We know better.

A slightly(well.. I don’t want to risk my balls) insane guy who always ensured that you finished your projects and reports and made sure the ball never went past the defence during the fresher’s. Pranenjyoti Sarkar, if only you had a little less of that affinity for things round I would have definitely voted you the as my candidate for the Pillar of Decency.

A sometimes long hair extremely thin guy who knew it all and made sure you gave up arguing even if you thought it was you who knew it all. Aman Khan , saale tere jhagrne se mera AKG mein 13 aaye. Nai to I was a sure shot 30 in the last sem”.

A too good TT player, too good academic, too good a guy who made sure your nerves went up before the exam with his “Hellllloooooo jaanish to kalke Ch**** debe porikkhai”. Debayan Roy we know that you know and you know that we know what’s behind that very well cultivated image. :P

A yo guy with that weird contraption of a headset who believed that birds were the ones for whom the game of Table Tennis was invented, who along with our dear Arnab made sure North road was always in business. Kausik Mukherjee, I bloody paid 60 bucks for that taxi to come to that final. It was my two days ka pocket money.

A guy with teeth more resembling some other species who actually managed to bite a bus conductor. Arijit Gorai someday I shall take revenge for the kicks I got during my last birthday and yes you copied well. Saved quite a few ###es during the classtests( Now Mr P don’t get angry, you’re still the best thing since Xerox).

A guy who made sure he got drunk every farewell party and started acting weird, who made dragged you through the dusty sweaty bylanes of Kolkata during your summer training to make sure you were absolutely clear on how CESC people dug up the roads. Soumava Mukhopadhyay, your songs were the elixir that made us live a little longer every single of those long nights.

And you. You who came late. Very late. Sudipta Samanta, wish I had found you the very first day itself. You have made my life.

Guys, I sincerely wish I could go back in time and take one more class test with the same seating arrangement. I sincerely wish I could go back in time and spend one more day in the union room talking about how Priyanka Chopra gave meaning to the universe.I sincerely wish i could go back in time and sit beneath that tree in front of staff canteen and keep on talking with you.

I sincerely wish I could go back and relive those four years again.

P.S.: It’s been a hectic week and now am kind of jobless. So, You get the sentimental part. And yeah you are not as bad as I portrayed. :P

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Oh!!! That 23:59:59 hrs deadline…

This was one article I wrote a few days back as a part of a committee task in the new institute I am in,One of those Well Known Institutes of Management in India(this one is in the southern parts).so here goes..

Oh!!! That 23:59:59 hrs deadline…

1. Rate the urgency, importance and complexity on a scale of one to nine and add the three figures together

2. Rate from one to nine how skilled you are at the task, then subtract this from 10

3. Multiply answers to 1 and 2 and divide by 20

4. Rate from one to nine how frequently you perform the task and divide this by 10

5. Rate the sine (or sin) of your answer to step 4 and subtract this from 1

6. Divide 1 by your answer to step 5

7. Multiply your answer to step 3 by 0.7 and multiply this by your answer to step 6, and that's your:

SOD’S LAW RATING also popularly known as Murphy’s law. To state simply

“Anything that can go wrong will go wrong”.

This is precisely how one feels every time one sees those famous, fabled numbers. 23:59:59. It seems like a counterculture (read GEEK) alternative for the “F” word. I want to use “F” but cannot and hence I use the 23:59:59 deadline and the effect is, if not more, definitely not less devastating.

Which is exactly the way this author is feeling right now. Or to put it in the new lingo, “I have been royally 23:59:59 ed” . This article has a 23:59:59 deadline. So does my task for another committee and so does my CV submission and hold your breath, so do two assignments from two subjects which I have absolutely no clue about. It’s like asking Ajit Agarkar to bat on a Perth pitch without any helmets. I am clueless.

It has become a routine to check the mail right after waking up with the search filter activated with 23:59:59. And then groan, shout, cry and then realise a vital few minutes out of those available is already lost. Then, you start running.

Lazy individual that I am, I dream at times that there would be a mail someday from somewhere stating “Deadlines are very sacrosanct. You need to make sure you go to sleep by 23:59:59.” And then I wake up. And lo! I have missed a 23:59:59 deadline. Not only is sleep lost due to the deadline but even more is lost pondering over what if the deadline is missed.

The saga continues and comes up with new ways and means to frighten you just when you thought you had it all figured out.

By the way, Did I tell u that I have a 06:59:59 deadline for a WAC?